Things I'd Like To Say If I Could

- Don't be early. Be earlier. Seriously. The judge will probably not care why you were late. Also, I don't really need to hear the story of why you were late.


- Always have your case number. You'll start out on the right foot if I don't have to spend time trying to find your case among the thousands we have.


- Tenants: pay your rent. Landlords: no, the process is probably not fair, but that's what you got yourself into when you decided to rent your property. If you don't like it, sell your house.


- Be nice to those people behind the counter. They kinda have you in the palm of their hands. If you're respectful and friendly, we'll remember that. We'll also remember if you're nasty, rude, offensive, or impatient. And we will tell our co-workers.


- Take. A. Shower. Please.

- Listen. Ask questions if you need to. Then LISTEN to the answers. Why did you ask for my help if you're going to walk away as I'm giving you the answer?


- Read the signs in the courthouse. It might not be as hard as you think.


- Show up for your hearings. It's your legal rights, people. The courthouse is not about fun and socialization.

- If you keep calling, you still won't get a different answer.

- If you owe money, pay it ASAP. There are these little things called court costs, pre-judgment interest, attorney's fees, and post judgment interest. Soon your $500 bill becomes $4000.

- Don't be mad at me when your wages get garnished. I'm not getting the money.


- Stay out of court. Trust me on this one. :)

Thanks! I feel better.